(This is a guest post from our friend Deirdre about her daughter Anna. Thank you for sharing with us, Deirdre.)
I lost my baby girl almost 3 years ago, I was 37 weeks and 1 day along and suddenly noticed that I did not feel the baby move for some time. I drank orange juice, poked around and nothing. I had a sinking feeling in my heart and went directly to the hospital. I was not prepared to hear the words that the doctor spoke. “I am sorry but there is no heartbeat.” I made it this far…how could this happen?
I had 3 healthy pregnancies and births before losing Anna… I felt like I was in a nightmare…one that I have not woken up from. The pain and grief that goes along with losing a baby to stillbirth is just unbearable and unimaginable. People just don’t understand how traumatic losing a child in this way can be… I felt so alone for so long…I felt anxious, depressed, guilty, heartbroken, angry, jealous..etc. When I finally was able to go back out into the world I felt like a leper and most definitely felt like “the elephant in the room.” The only people that could truly help me were people that had experienced what I had.
I am grateful to you for bringing attention to a subject that is considered taboo and is never discussed. There is so much more to my story…and to the story of too many others.
Thank you!
Deirdre
Thank you Deirdre!