Janine’s Story

(This is a guest blog from Pauline about her daughter Janine. Thank you for sharing this with us, Pauline.)

My baby girl was born sleeping 37 years ago on march the 24th we named her Janine.

All those years ago if a baby didn’t take a breath you were not allowed to officially name your own baby. The day Janine was born started as a normal day. I was 3 weeks overdue and had been sent home from my antenatal vist once again to wait for labour to start naturally. That night I woke at 11 pm thinking my waters had broken but when I looked my bed was covered in blood and I was bleeding heavily. We rang for an ambulance and taken to hospital. I had no pains and the midwife who met us at the hospital said “the sooner this baby is born the better.”

I was taken to a room and a doctor was called. I was put on a monitor to check my babies heart and at that time the tracing was normal. The doctor decided to attach a machine to my babies head to to check on her but he dropped the machine and it broke no other machine was available. I was still bleeding but nothing was done for four hours. When the monitor attached to my abdomen started to show my baby was getting weaker they decided to take me to theatre to perform a c section. As I was waiting to be taken the doctor checked my babies heartbeat then a midwife checked I knew something was wrong and the doctor said ”Your baby is dead.”

I was distraught and asked what would happen now he said ”You will be taken back and give birth I won’t do a c section for a dead baby.”

I was taken back to my room my husband walked in he had been told our baby had died but not that I had still to give birth. As you can imagine we were both sobbing he said ”at least the birth is over.”

I then had to tell him myself that I still had to deliver the baby. My husband had to leave the room as fathers could not stay all those years ago. I was placed on a drip to speed the contractions and given pain relief. My little girl was born to a silent room and put into a tin oval shaped baby bath.

I was not allowed to see my baby and the only thing I saw of her was her back as the put her in. Janine was taken away and I never saw her, never held her. She was gone forever and even now all these years later I think about her everyday. The damage that was caused to myself and my family by the treatment we received has been never ending.

Please if one thing comes from your film let it be to teach all medical staff to treat parents at this devastating time how to care for them and to be kind and please give them the chance to hold their baby for the first and last time.